It's cool to care

You're not nonchalant, you're just a f*cking dick

Lately, I’ve noticed that being “nonchalant” is trending. Like, aggressively so. My TikTok algorithm is filled with people praising celebs for being so effortlessly cool, carless and in my eyes…. boring. It seems like everyone wants to be effortlessly detached these days, too cool to care, permanently unbothered. Excitement is out; indifference is in. Vulnerability has been swapped for a curated sense of ….whatever???And honestly? I hate it.

When did emotion become something to be rationed out in tiny, socially acceptable doses? When did enthusiasm become embarrassing? It’s like we’ve collectively decided that the worst thing you can be is earnest, that admitting you care about something is somehow cringeworthy, and that passion is a liability.

We’re living in an era where people treat joy like it’s shameful and feelings like they’re something to be overcome. As if giving a shit about something, about anything, is a personal failing. As if we all have to play the brooding lead in some self-serious indie film where nobody actually laughs, they just exhale sharply through their noses and say, heh as they take a drag from a cigarette.

But here’s the thing: nonchalance isn’t mysterious. It isn’t alluring. It isn’t interesting.

It’s boring. It’s rude.

I seriously hate people who don’t care. Like… just FUCKING care. (I know you do.)

If something excites you, admit it. If something upsets you, let it. If you’re proud of yourself, celebrate. Stop diluting your emotions just to fit into some half-baked aesthetic of detachment. Stop pretending you don’t want things. Want them loudly. Chase them unapologetically.

And for fuck’s sake, embarrass yourself. Be cringey. Be earnest. Be all the things that nonchalant people are terrified of being. Because the truth is, you don’t create memories by holding back. You don’t stumble into the best nights of your life by making sure you always look effortless. You don’t fall in love, build friendships, or do anything worthwhile by being so obsessed with appearing unbothered that you never actually experience anything.

The best moments in life—the ones you replay in your head years later, the ones that make you grin at your own ridiculousness—come from caring too much. From throwing yourself into things without hesitation. From looking back and thinking, wow, that was so dumb, but knowing you wouldn’t change a second of it.

The most admirable traits in a person are the ones that define them. Passion. Kindness. Drive. A sense of humor about themselves. There’s nothing defining about nonchalance, because nonchalance is just an absence of character. It’s a refusal to be shaped by life, to be moved by anything, to let the world leave a mark on you. And what’s the point of that?

I care that you don’t care, and most importantly, I judge.

Recognise your wins. Acknowledge your lows. Laugh at yourself. Take risks. Make mistakes. Be fully present in your own life.

The most interesting people aren’t the ones who are hard to read—they’re the ones who aren’t afraid to be seen.

xoxo